On not being a Grinch (AKA who is this person?!?)


Yesterday was kind of weird.

Having moved into this new, strange stage where I’m not automatically feeling depressed about everything, I all of a sudden have found some Christmas spirit. I lost my Christmas spirit about 7 years ago when my Stepfather died and it never really returned. Until now.

Over the weekend I bought a small table top tree from IKEA (we don’t have room in our house for a big tree…or maybe I’m not willing to commit to a big tree. A big tree means I have fully embraced the Christmas spirit and I’m not sure I’m ready to go full on Christmas). Yesterday was the day I decided to dig my Christmas ornaments out of the closet and put them up.

As I did this I found something from my childhood: A set of porcelain carolers that my mom must have given me a few years ago. As I unwrapped them I was filled with the most wonderful feeling. I was instantly taken back to my the living room of my childhood and the weeks leading up to Christmas in my house. We had these, and a number of other decorations adorning the house. I would play with the dolls (very carefully) and was just generally captivated with them. I felt that sense of thrill in the lead-up to Christmas when I was a child, before I found out Santa isn’t real, that magical time.

“What a nice gift, to feel that feeling again, momentarily”, I thought to myself yesterday.

And even as I unpacked the rest of my Christmas ornaments I felt happy as the memories of past Christmases came to mind.

The feeling was still with me as I went to the store. I found myself shopping for the right candles to put in my Christmas candle holders and wondering who I was. I don’t do this type of thing! But it felt good. And as I looked around at all of the other people smiling, looking at the Christmas ornaments for sale, I understood what they were feeling.

Honestly, it was a relief to look at Christmas decorations and not feel irritation. And indeed, maybe even a little bit of happiness. Maybe I’m not a Grinch after all.

A very Holga Christmas



My next Holga image is from my first roll of B&W through my Holga. Also: it was shot on Christmas of 2011, so I thought it was appropriate to post it today.

Merry Christmas to all of my wonderful readers! Thank you for making this blogging thing fun. I really have enjoyed connecting with all of you.

What I was doing at noon on Christmas


This was the daily prompt for Christmas on the Daily Post.

At noon today, take a pause in what you’re doing or thinking about. Make a note of it, and write a post about it later.

Raf and I were Driving home from Long Beach, WA. We were exactly at the interchange on I-5 and  I-205. I was specifically thinking about the Historic Columbia River Highway. We were listening to a song that reminded me of Santa Cruz. I didn’t write down the name of the song and now it completely eludes me. It was a terribly rainy and cold day and visibility was awful. I was really looking forward to getting home. I was also very happy, having just had a really fun couple of days with my favorite person.

I also snapped a photo of this exact moment in the car.
High noon



hideous Christmas gif

This holiday season I am sending loving kindness to everyone who reads this blog. Thank you so very much for reading and visiting my little corner of the intertubes. I am grateful for every single one of you.

May you be happy.
May you be well.
May you be safe.
May you live with ease.