For the past week I’ve been eating really healthy, and not even really spending a huge amount of effort on it. Well, with the exception of Sunday. I have been making juice in the morning and I try to eat a salad for lunch (this doesn’t always happen). The main thing is that I havent’ had as much sugar. Actually, my sugar intake has dropped down to almost zero. I have a teaspoon in my coffee in the morning but that’s it (for the most part). Yesterday I had a piece of that there cake that you see in the photo above. It is from a bakery in town that is delicious, Tollgate Bakery, and I love everything that they make. However, when I took a few bites of this cake I almost vomited. There was so. much. sugar. I had to throw most of it away. This just doesn’t happen with me and cake. I never throw cake away, ever. There might be hope for me! I may, yet, end this sugar addiction! yay!
I watched the documentary, “Fat, Sick, & Nearly Dead” a few days ago and now I am inspired to go on a juice fast. I am on my way to buy a new juicer now. I won’t start the fast right away. I am going to give myself a week to prepare. I will let you know how it goes. You can find more information about juice fasting at RebootYourLife.
My mom is in the hospital with pneumonia. She’s been in since Wednesday of last week. She came down with it two weekends ago when I was in Spokane visiting. We all thought it was the flu but it turned out to be much worse. A week ago today she ended up in ICU because it had quickly spread into her bloodstream. She almost died. We were all really afraid last weekend that she wasn’t going to make it. But she did and she is doing very well now. She is getting stronger every day and will hopefully be released from the hospital soon. Probably today. I am so unbelievably happy that she is o.k. I seriously don’t know what I would have done had she not made it. I kind of don’t want to even think about it because it is so depressing.
So I ended up getting a pneumonia shot on Tuesday. Honestly, I had no clue that it was contagious. So I’d like to avoid going through what my mom did, thankyouverymuch. At least if I can help it. So I went to the doctor on Tuesday to see about getting a shot. I had to wait to get a doctor’s approval (because they generally only give them to those 65 or older) but when I explained my story they were kind enough to give me one. They asked me if I wanted a Tetanus shot as well. I said, “Sure! And why don’t you also give me a flu shot while I’m here too!” So they did. Happily.
Did you know that Tetanus shots cause vomiting and nausea? I had no idea. Until I woke up Wednesday morning to make coffee. I was all, “Oh I’m so excited to get up this morning so I can drink my coffee and knit!” And then I wandered down the stairs and I was all, “Hmm. I’m not sure I’m feeling super great.” Then I started to make the coffee and was interrupted with the sudden urge to vomit. So that was fun. As a bonus? My right arm feels like someone slugged me really, really hard.
I’m just glad everything turned out o.k. Very glad.
I took the above photo last weekend at Wildwood. The forest is brimming with all kinds of new growth right now. It’s really lovely.
Oh my goodness! how has more than a week gone by? I’ve been busy.
I met Preita again for coffee! This time at Tiny’s in NorthEast Portland. I think so far this is my favorite place. It wasn’t pretentious. The coffee was pretty good. Everything about it was cool. Except for one thing. There were two toilets in the restroom. What. The. Fuck. My mind doesn’t even know how to process it. It was just weird. Portland is weird. And I’ve lived in Santa Cruz. So that’s saying a lot.
We wandered around the neighborhood and shot some of the scenery. It was kind of a rough looking area, which is fun photography-wise.
I’m going to end this post on a completely different subject. I just found out today that the House voted to cut funding to Planned Parenthood. This is really bad. I don’t know if the House of Representatives understands the importance of this institution to millions of men and women in this country. For me, personally, Planned Parenthood was very important in many different ways. It wasn’t until I was in my late twenties that I finally got health insurance through my full time job. Up until then I absolutely relied on Planned Parenthood for my annul exam.
They provided me with the birth control pill, for free, which was a god send. See, we live in a time when a woman can choose to have a child or not have a child. This is incredible. I feel so incredibly grateful to be living in this time in history. Planned Parenthood makes this choice a reality for women who wouldn’t otherwise be able to afford it and this is a very good thing.
And, yes, I had an abortion when I was in my early twenties. And I was able to do this through Planned Parenthood. The experience was very safe and very professional. The radicals outside the clinic were an entirely different story. I’ve never written about this experience before and maybe I should. But I do have to say that I am very grateful that Planned Parenthood was there during this time in my life. Of course there are mixed feelings surrounding this decision I made. But I am very, very grateful that I was able to make the decision. If it wasn’t for Planned Parenthood that decision wouldn’t even be there.
They are an essential service. Please consider signing their petition.
This year, though, I’m going to throw out resolutions. Totally throw them out completely. Because I usually set a resolution on New Years Day and feel really excited about it for about a month and then I totally lose interest and then feel like a failure. Instead, I’m going to think in terms of Practice.
I’ll continue this being healthy thing that I’ve been doing (which I’ve sort of fallen off the wagon on the past couple of weeks). But I want to approach it as a practice. I came across this interpretation of the Five Precepts by Thich Nhat Hanh that I really like. He approaches them as Mindfulness Trainings. The Fifth Mindfulness Training is:
Aware of the suffering caused by unmindful consumption, I vow to cultivate good health, both physical and mental, for myself, my family, and my society by practicing mindful eating, drinking and consuming. I vow to ingest only items that preserve peace, well-being and joy in my body, in my consciousness, and in the collective body and consciousness of my family and society. I am determined not to use alcohol or any other intoxicant or to ingest foods or other items that contain toxins, such as certain TV programs, magazines, books, films and conversations. I am aware that to damage my body or my consciousness with these poisons is to betray my ancestors, my parents, my society and future generations. I will work to transform violence, fear, anger and confusion in myself and in society by practicing a diet for myself and for society. I understand that a proper diet is crucial for self-transformation and for the transformation of society.
I love this! So I am going to approach my healthy lifestyle with this mindfulness practice in mind. Granted, it might not be easy all the time, but I’ll do my best.
With this in mind, I had kind of a crazy idea yesterday on my way to work. I thought to myself, “What if, for an entire year, I didn’t buy anything for myself?” Really. What would that be like? Obviously I would have to buy food and things like that. But I’m thinking about purchases like books and, basically, stuff. Stuff that takes up space that I don’t really, really need.
Obviously, today is the first day of the year and I’m not sure I’m going to jump right into this today. But I’m going to think about it a little bit. It’s an interesting idea, I think.
As far as other goals, I’m just going to keep doing what I’ve been doing these past few months. Learning the ukulele, continuing with my zazen, etc. Just basically going with the flow.
I’m excited to see what 2011 has in store.
Happy New Year!