O.K. I’ll admit it. I struggle with depression sometimes. I’m sure this isn’t a huge revelation to anyone who knows me or has read my blog for any length of time. But sometimes I just have to admit to myself that I’m depressed. And sometimes this depression can lead me down some very dark roads. And it really sucks, as those of you who go through it know.
Yesterday was one of those days. I couldn’t seem to pull myself the fuck out of it. it was like falling into a pit of oozing mud and I just slid further and further in and the more I tried to get out the further in the hole I got. Oh god, and then there is that inner critic. Do you have that “inner critic?” I think we all do. Well, mine is a heartless, cruel, bastard.
Anyway, So I woke up still feeling a bit like crap. I meditated and that helped immensely. I exercised. That helped too. Then I went through my morning internet ritual of checking e-mail, twitter, facebook. Someone posted a video of Earth Wind and Fire‘s September on twitter and I can’t even begin to tell you how happy it made me feel. The sun was coming up and it was going to be a beautiful day and here was this song that took me straight back to the happiness of my childhood in the Seventies. It was wonderful. It was like a gift from the universe. And how awesome that these little gifts are delivered by other beings (human or animal, or even just things in nature) in this universe?
It just makes me realize how connected we all are. We can help each other in ways we don’t even realize. I love that. this person on Twitter that has no idea I exist made me very happy today. I hope that I can do the same thing for someone who needs it someday.