Deflated

deflated

Feeling kind of blah and uninspired lately, and so haven’t been blogging. I miss this space, though. So I thought I’d slap a photo up there and start typing and see what comes out.

I bought a Holga a few weeks ago and am super excited about using it! I shot my first two rolls and dropped them off to be developed on Monday. The first roll I know will be hilariously crappy because I forgot to advance the film several times. So some of the frames have multiple exposures. It will be fun to see what they look like.

I also picked up some batteries for my old film camera! I’m excited about that, too. I plan to, very soon, buy a photo scanner that scans negatives so I can post these little film experiments.

As you’ve probably deduced, I’m really interested in film photography lately. Actually, I’m kind of interested in analog lately. That’s the word: analog. The word of 2012. Well, actually, there are two  “A” words that describe what I want to strive for next year: authenticity and analog.

I mentioned film photography as one way of expressing this need to express myself in this way. But writing is another. I think I will do lots of my writing in a notebook as opposed to typing things out on a computer. I think there is something to the tactile nature of writing things out long-hand that lends itself to creativity, that taps into that intuitive side of ourselves. So I’m going to try more of it next year and see what happens.

The authenticity is pretty much exactly what it sounds like. I want to be authentic in everything that I do. Meditating this past year has really caused me to awaken to who I really am and it has really helped to see the façade that I have built around myself. That person that I want others to see. It’s so easy to do on the internet, isn’t it? I look at Facebook as one big, giant façade. It is rare to see any kind of authenticity there. Which I suppose is o.k. It’s the way it is. It’s a mirror of reality. But I can’t go back to that way of living. It feels so good to just say fuckit and be myself. So I’m gonna do more of it.

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